Saturday, November 15, 2008

I Fear It's Getting Worse, Folks.....

Spotted on Craigslist personals this morning.....

freins first is okay(but if good loving dont fallow?) - m4w - 55 (oakland pk blvd)
Reply to:
Date: 2008-11-15, 3:27AM EST

you need to find a gay person

hi i am from lebanon all that freind stuff (& going out )with no hope in sight is a boaring realation (dont you think)

get a dog call me i f you need a good man w/solid back bone

sam 954 552 3437

better yeath send me your photo (i hope you dont look like you know)

Location: oakland pk blvd
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interestsPostingID: 919857172

Here is my (never to be mailed) response:

Dear Sam:
In addition to the atrocious spelling, which is making my eye twitch as I scan my desk for a red pen, I must comment on the fact that you do not exactly present as God's gift to women.
And, no, "sam" I don't know what you mean when you write that if I send a picture, "you don't look like YOU KNOW"---you mean, LIKE YOU?
Because unless you have an enormously huge penis, or tongue or bank account, I predict that you will be advertising on Craigslist for a looooong time.
Some suggestions:
1. Use spellcheck/dictionary/or a smart friend to correct your spelling and grammar.
2. Leave gay references out of your ad---it screams IGNORANT!!
3. Make sure you have a solid erection to go with the solid backbone.
4. Don't post a picture of you and your mother (or is that you with "YOU KNOW" which case
it explains the expression on your face.
I will be checking back often to see how you are doing....I hope that your ad does not migrate to the "casual encounters" section, but I suppose you must do what you must do.....
Good Luck,