Monday, September 1, 2008

Surrogate Cat Sex


My kitty is in heat--My four-footed one,thanks
(no, Joe: Mine is not on the shelf, Bucko)

The poor thing is so miserable and Im going to get her fixed...she is on the list at the Spay Shuttle. Palm Beach County's answer to low cost, conveyor belt styled spay and neutering services. She is #1600 or was when I called and scheduled 2 months ago....

In the meanwhile, she is miserable and so are we. Its not the caterwauling that is usually the norm,but rather the rubbing and grunting and squirming and POSTURING that is the problem. So, I went online---and here is what I found. Once I got done laughing at the sheer perversity of introducing a q-tip into my cats vagina and simulating sex, I hid all the q-tips in case my son happened to read this post. Without further ado....please read the article that started it all....

How To Calm A Cat In Heat <--If anyone else has any realistic and less bestiality type hints, please feel free to let me know. Until then I will be attempting to cut in line at the Spay Shuttle...

3 comments:

RBV said...

My goodness! OMFG! WTF?! Speechless. I do, however, especially enjoy the line "If humans had orgasms with the intensity of a cat serviced in this way there would be no such thing as war, hunger, capitalism or God."

Tangentially, all I can think is, imagine if this sicko spent his time on other things...it makes me glad he sticks to cats. Sad, but true. Poor kitty.

Onknees (not_onknees at the moment) said...

Hahhha....I agree with you...on all counts....

t2ed said...

I am never going to be able to use a Q-tip again.