The Unhappy Knee: A Social Story

Well folks, as you can see, the left knee is unhappy. The right knee wants to make it smile. The left knee is not having any part of it. The right knee says, "Come on, lets go dancing. I'll even let you lead" . Instead it wants to wallow in self pity and maybe a martini or two intermittently wailing "Why me?" between sips....

The good news--> the visit to the doctor went well. She got all the wire out except for a piece that is behind my knee-ouch and that she says she tried to get, but just could not. Unless it causes a problem, surgery to remove it is a high risk deal because of artery, veins and other encumbrances.

Bad news--> The stitches stay in and I return next Wednesday morning. At which time i will be moved into my new first story digs and able to devote myself to physical therapy and the business of getting better.

Ah--There they are!!!!

Its not a great picture,(my camera is MIA and I had to use a webcam) but you get the idea. The high heeled, 1940's bedroom diva accessory. the only thing missing is a long cigarette holder and a maribou trimmed peignoir- but Im working on it.....
Im not one to enjoy sitting still for any amount of time, so I am dividing my time between deciding what to pitch as I scale back possessions and then elevating and icing the leg. Tomorrow, i see the doc, I have an 8" scar (I peeked) with about a jillion staples). Im going to need some liqid courage before I let her loose with those staple removers. She might need something as well-like earplugs.

where are my red patent leather bedroom mules with the frou frou on the tops?

Well...I will be brief...I feel a bit better today. Im getting around, and Im starting to feel bored ( all good signs). I have not been taking pain pills and would really like a drink, but I will be good and just relax, JUST in case I do need a pain pill later.
I have been in my closet...perusing the shoes....trying to decide....what to do?........
I think Ill pack something (Im moving) and perhaps something will come to me...an idea, a glass of wine, a martini, or perhaps the name of a medical malpractice attorney, who knows?

Can Flip Flops be considered evening wear?

There it is folks.....The "thing". I think I would rather have this on rather than see whats underneath. Tuesday morning I will see the doc and the drama will start all over again (her words. not mine).
Today has been better in the pain department, Im still not hungry (couldnt i stand to lose a few pounds?) and I dont dread those trips to the bathroom as much...Im hoping that this recovery will be significantly better than the one 8 years ago. I will definitely be better about the physical therapy.....
As bad as I look, a friend decided to brave the site of me and picked up some soup for lunch and spent some time with me. I do not recommend doing this until I shower, since I am getting pretty ripe. Lulu is at the Warp tour in Miami and made me swear to wait til she got home---not a problem, there is a lot involved including trash bags and duct tape. (If I work it right, I could get a bikini wax with every shower) okay never mind, I must be feeling better--that sense of humor is coming back.....

The worst is over....or is it?

Its been almost 24 hours since I have been home. Patrick picked me up and filled my pain medication scrip before helping me upstairs. The whole thing is a bit fuzzy. I have this huge immobilizer on my leg with a lunch cooler with a trolling motor in it that constantly circulates ice water under the bandages. Pretty neat trick--why didnt I think of it? I have Percoset for pain. I thought the stuff would knock me out, but instead, I wake up every 10 minutes. Its pretty annoying, making this the longest 24 hours of my life. Im also very very thirsty, but the more I drink, the more I have to pee and of course that imvolves unhooking myself from this virtual life support system and making it to the bathroom before I pee...its all very depressing.
Lauren is going out til Satuday night and I welcome that because I really dont like having people feeling like they cant leave me alone. I did send her to the store with a list :)
4 bags ice, 4 2liters of diet ginger ale, bath tissue and a newspaper ( i think i covered all the essentials). Well, just a brief update....til tomorrow

I have run out of excuses....

Todays the day..Yesterday I was looking for any excuse to have to put off the surgery. Examples: I have asthma, I have a cold, can't find my living will, no ride to the Surgicenter, etc. All lame and useless...What can I say? I am a pain weenie, always have been. Even though I was in pain at the moment, I also knew that the after pain was going to be the worst.
I have kept myself busy to avoid thinking of the inevitable and performing self therapy (is that a word?), talking to myself and reminding myself that I have always been tough and daring, willing to go here no man has gone before, yadda yadda yadda and swearing not to act like a wimp as I got older (something I do not admire in others).
So....my cab is here (I really did not have a way there) and I will be back in touch as soon as I am able......

Will I Dance Again?

You know, I think the universe must be conspiring to keep me from entering "So You Think You Can Dance"...This morning I woke up with a congested upper chest (stop-I know what your thinking) and some kind of productive coughing---but all in all, feeling like shit. I slogged through the day, finally acceepting the fact that I was going to go through this whole ordeal again---alone. yes folks, alone...long story but if you are interested i'll tell ya... My surgery is not scheduled until 3PM. I have to meet with the anesthesioligist an dhope that he can do it, if not I have to wait til Tues AND have another Pre-OP clearance---JOY...of curse at my expense.
Im sensing pessimism on my part and do not wish to engage, so i will stop now, have a glass of wine before my 12 midnight cut off time and relax.....more tomorrow

Just when you thought it was safe to get back on stilettos....

Christmas time 1999, I fell and broke my kneecap. It was traumatic, painful, a slow recovery and left me with an ugly scar that time has thankfully made less red and raw. leading the life that I had up to this point, I can honestly say that if that was as bas as it got at age 41, I was darn lucky and should not complain.
After 7 years or so of not wearing high heels due to this painful extended recovery period,, I had amassed quite a collection of sexy high heeled shoes that I knew I was destined to wear again. Crimson, olive tones, black, tans...every color of the rainbow...purchased and lovinglykept in see thru shoe boxes which would make it easier for me to choose which ones to wear---when I could do so again. I would wear them with jeans, pants, dresses and maybe with lingerie---who knows? But I WOULD wear them again. My daughter looked at them and thought I was crazy, but I didnt care. I would buy, save and wear--one day...
And I did----2 weeks ago-----I met a gentleman who liked Karaoke. Well, I cant sing (that would be "scaraoke"), so while I accompanied him, I did not sing, but instead I spent those nights dancing in my heels to the songs that people with varying degrees of talent belted out.
I had a great time....the best in 7 years....
On July 10, 2007, I am at work (Im a teacher) and upon attempting to get up from my desk, I cried out in pain and sat back down. I could not believe that sound came from me. Even my students were scared...and trust me, not much scares them. The consensus from everyone from the school nurse to the custodian was that I should go to the nearest hospital. So I did....
Well, imagine my surprise ( a bit of sarcasm here) when i view these xrays and lo and behold, the wiring around the kneecap has not only come undone, but a piece has broken off and lodged itself in my knee joint, hence the pain when I tried to straighten my leg. While I stare in amazement at these xrays, the doctors are telling me it needs to be taken care of immediately. Of course the 2 doctors that did the surgery almost 8 years ago, are on vacation. Me? Iim working summer school in order to be able to take a vacation. I got a a crash course in hospital politics. It seems that if the original doctor is not affiliated with the hospital , he is not obligated to see me and on the other hand, the orthopedic doctor on cal at the time in the ER, did not want to deal with fixing another doctors surgery. that leaves the patient in limbo and cranks up the pissed off factor---in addition to fondling the yellow pages in the area of "medical malpractice attorneys". Okay, so i was fantasizing, but it made me feel good.